Painful Questions

Facing Struggles With Faith

by Gary L. Watts

These questions are also available to be downloaded as a Word document or as a PDF file.

Introduction	Chapters 1-3	Chapters 4-6
Chapters 7-9	Chapters 10-12	Chapter 13 & Epilogue

Chapter 4: Freedom and Relationship

Summary:
Human free choice cannot account for all of our pain. But it does affect us adversely in ways that are often overlooked. It adds to our suffering through the broken relationships with other human beings and with God that result from our bad decisions. Many problems could be surmounted if we worked together, and many sorrows could be overcome through mutual support. But isolation and loneliness are produced by our inability to live together, and they redouble our suffering.

Related Scriptures:
Gen. 2:18; Phil. 2:4; 2 Cor. 1:4; Rom. 12:10; Ps. 46; Eph. 2:12; 2 Cor. 5:17.

Discussion Questions:

This chapter opens with a story about a family pet (50). What is the point to that story? Does the idea apply to human relationships as well?
The flood in Grand Forks, North Dakota, was a overwhelming tragedy (52-53). But what else can we learn about ourselves from that tragedy?
Can you think of any specific problems that our community might be better able to solve if we all dedicated ourselves to working together?
*To what degree are we responsible for the pain of others if we do not help to relieve their pain when we can?
Describe a situation in which a broken relationship made life’s pain harder to bear. What does this tell us about the connection between human freedom and suffering?
*We often wonder why a loving God allows us to suffer. If humanity had a better relationship to their Creator, would that resolve this question or make it worse? Why?
Compare and contrast the two fictional stories about the children struck by disease (56-59). What factors make their suffering different?
In what ways has our relationship with God been broken? What are some of the results of this break in communication?
Why do we need others to listen to us? What problems commonly arise with human listeners?
Can you think of any examples in which a renewed relationship with God has helped to assuage the pain of life?

Journal-Reflection Suggestion:
Think about relationships that are important to you. List some of the ways these connections support you during difficult times. Are there relationships in your life that need to be repaired? What would it take to repair them?

Chapter 5: Live and Learn

Summary:
Though all pain cannot be explained in a rational manner, some suffering does seem to serve a purpose. First, it sometimes warns us of greater danger to come. Though we have all experienced the truth of this, we must be careful about trying to fit all pain into this category. For in various cases, the painful warning seems more destructive than the danger toward which it points.

Second, suffering can help us develop our character and lead us to maturity. But we must also be careful of applying this idea too freely; depending on our reaction, difficulties may make us bitter just as easily as they may make us brave.

Related Scriptures:
James 1:2-4; Rom. 5:3-4; Phil. 3:8.

Discussion Questions:

What does it mean to say that pain can be a "warning sign"?
*We know physical pain can tell us that something is wrong. Can psychological pain also serve a warning function? If so, what might be an example of this?
What kinds of pain do not seem to serve as a warning at all? Why do you think God would allow this kind of pain?
What caused the Japanese student to change his approach to life in a new land (70-71)?
Parents often push children to do things they do not want to do (e.g., eating vegetables, practicing piano). Why do we do this when the process causes them pain?
When we need comfort, why do we tend to turn to people who have themselves experienced suffering?
*Some have suggested that to become mature (wise, independent, caring), we must face adversity. If this is so, would it not be preferable to simply remain immature? Why?
One of the purposes of suffering may be the building of character. What does it mean to be a person of character? Of what value in life is a sound character?
Adversity can serve to build our character. But it also can make us angry and bitter. What do you think determines whether it has one effect or the other?
Page 79 speaks of the "paradox of happiness." In the context, what does this phrase mean? Does this seem true to you? Explain why or why not.

Journal-Reflection Suggestion:
What lessons have you learned from the difficulties of life? Write down some of these learnings you might be willing to share with your discussion group. Have there been times when you did not learn or grow from problems? What do you think prevented this?

Chapter 6: Is There a Method in the Madness?

Summary:
Human responsibility, broken relationships, and the various purposes of pain—all help us to understand the fact-finding question of why we suffer. But in spite of this, much of our suffering remains unexplained.

Thus we ask if there is any method in this madness. There are at least two possible responses to this question: First, there are some joys we cannot obtain without pain and sacrifice, such as the satisfaction of a job well done or the restoration of something that has been lost. Second, the more important question is not whether there is any method in the madness, but whether the joy finally attained can overshadow the pain encountered along the way.

Related Scriptures:
Ps. 66:1; Heb. 12:2; Rev. 21:4; John 11:25.

Discussion Questions:

Explain the significance of the story about the King and his quest (84-85). How does this story supply an analogy for our lives?
This chapter discusses the difference between the enjoyment of a night at the opera and the enjoyment of a football game (86). Can you offer other examples of quite different and yet equally valuable types of joy?
What does chapter 6 describe as "surprise parties of life" (87)? Can you share some of your experiences with such joy? How would you describe its unique value?
Can you describe the feeling of a "job well done"? Since many jobs can be tedious, hard, or painful, how can a "job well done" be considered a joy?
The author and his wife "borrowed" the story of Heinrich Harrer to encourage them in their own adventure (92). How do the tales of how others survived great difficulty help us in the adventure of living?
*Some have suggested that this is the "best of possible worlds" (Dr. Pangloss, in Voltaire’s Candide, 1759). What does this phrase mean? Do you think it is true?
Is there anything of comfort that can be said to people whose suffering is truly overwhelming?
What is the "joy of restoration"? At what times in life do we tend to focus on this hope?
Try to think of other "joys" than the three mentioned in this chapter? What makes these "joys" unique?
*Do you prefer one type of joy to another? Would life be more enjoyable or less enjoyable if the joys that contain pain were left out?

Journal-Reflection Suggestion:
Describe several of the greatest joys of your life. How were these joys similar, and how were they different? Keep your eyes open this week to all the variety of joys that life affords. Write down as many as you can.

Mennonite Publishing Network